Thanks for calling. If you're reaching out to sell your soul, I'll already know and I'll be there soon. If you're calling to just talk, leave a message and I'll call you back when I can. Which will probably be soon. Talk to you then~
[Rinku makes an unsure noise, but she looks at Max and thinks.]
I want to keep trying. I want to make everyone happy. More than anything. Thanks, Davis-san. [sniff] I wanna apologize for dragging you down, though. You had to step in after all because I couldn't handle it on my own. Neechan told me no one should be trying to take on high-risk quests alone anyway, but still, the deal was that you'd only have to do it if I needed help.
You're welcome. And please don't apologize. I did want to pick that one for a few reasons. One of them being to show you that some threats cannot be handled alone, even by someone like me. Helping people means letting them help you. It means working together to Happy Around, not doing it all on your own. You like it when people let you help them, they like it when they can help you back.
I mean, I had stuff that made me good against them, like light magic and charms against corrupted fae. But I still wasn't strong enough, so I needed your help. And that's why? Because you'd have to help in the end anyway, so... [give her a minute] ...so I could learn that.
...You mentioned the thing with Clover-san. Is this about that? Because I knew I wasn't strong enough to help, and that's why I wanted to try high-risk quests again?
[It's not like she was secretive about that, so it'd be easy for Max to have known she wasn't there and why. The other half of that "why" being that she'd just been recovering from mind control herself.]
You're getting the lessons. We can't always help directly in a fight. But you can help after or in other ways. Keeping people away from the danger zone. Helping restore morale after the fighting is done. Warning people about repeat danger, like with Mr. Clover.
You can help, Rinku. You can make a difference. It isn't always through violence.
[Rinku slumps a little and thinks. Drinks her juice.]
I know. Other people have said that too. Is that because no matter how strong I get or how hard I try, the other people around me will always be way better? I know that, and I know they probably think that too... but I still wanna keep trying. This is what I can do too.
But that doesn't mean the other stuff isn't good. And I can do it. Most of it, anyway. I didn't even suspect anything was wrong until it happened. That kinda happens a lot with me.
[Max is quiet for a moment. A soft expression finds it's way onto his face.]
Rinku, no matter who you talk to, who you look up to, whoever you look up to or look down on, there is always someone stronger. There are people and things and being stronger than me. There is, always, a bigger fish.
If you want power, to be a bigger fish, that takes more than hard work. That takes deals, invention, and you to do things. Some good. Some terrible.
[Rinku blinks a few times. She kicks her feet a little and looks at her drink, then at Max.]
Maybe that's not the right question. I mean, if I made more deals like that, it'd just make them worry, and if I did something bad, it wouldn't be helping at all. It's kind of like what caused this whole thing in the first place, right? When... [She screws up her face to think of the names she's been told.] Prince Louis listened to the Pierrot instead of his brother, and let him put all the stolen powers into him and ran away, and then all this stuff happened.
[Not to mention that he, you know, exploded not long after, so he didn't even really benefit. But.]
Some people talk a whole lot about evolution or being naturally better. And I guess a lot of people here seem like they're naturally better. But it's like you said before, one person shouldn't do it alone. And even if I'm "just" a human, and I used to be normal, and I only learned to fight here, it doesn't mean I can't keep trying.
[She looks at Max, guileless. Wondering, of everything he's said today, which he's really getting at -- but maybe thinking all that's a little complicated. She sets down her glass and starts to draw a spiral shape with her fingertip on the counter.]
Hm, let's see... When I'm happy, I can't stop spinning. Records and CDs spin when they play. And a lot of seashells, they spiral out like they're spinning, too. And when you spin, it's like, 「Happy Around!」 You know? It moves outward in a circle, like the shells. Happiness spreads out that way too!
So I think, even if I don't take it, I'll keep changing here the way I have been, and I'll always keep getting better than I am now. Even if I'm not a god, I'm just me. And maybe that's still good enough. Because it really isn't about the power in the first place. Getting stronger's about what I can do for everyone else, and how they're all doing their best too.
Sounds like you've found a path to walk after all. Spinning around, spreading your happiness out in that Happy Around spiral.
People worrying about you isn't always a bad thing either. Depends on the amount of worry. Everyone worries about the people they care about, the people they love. That's natural and good. Now, if you start inspiring panic attacks, then there might actually be an issue.
[Rinku absolutely brightens. She nods a few times.]
Yeah! Yeah, yeah! Then I'll work hard! I'm gonna keep trying, and maybe I'll be better than I am now. And maybe I won't worry so much like I was for the longest time.
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chiming
no subject
Date: 2025-01-02 01:22 am (UTC)From:[Rinku makes an unsure noise, but she looks at Max and thinks.]
I want to keep trying. I want to make everyone happy. More than anything. Thanks, Davis-san. [sniff] I wanna apologize for dragging you down, though. You had to step in after all because I couldn't handle it on my own. Neechan told me no one should be trying to take on high-risk quests alone anyway, but still, the deal was that you'd only have to do it if I needed help.
no subject
Date: 2025-01-02 04:59 pm (UTC)From:Do you see what I'm getting at?
no subject
Date: 2025-01-02 05:07 pm (UTC)From:[Rinku tilts her head and hums.]
I mean, I had stuff that made me good against them, like light magic and charms against corrupted fae. But I still wasn't strong enough, so I needed your help. And that's why? Because you'd have to help in the end anyway, so... [give her a minute] ...so I could learn that.
...You mentioned the thing with Clover-san. Is this about that? Because I knew I wasn't strong enough to help, and that's why I wanted to try high-risk quests again?
[It's not like she was secretive about that, so it'd be easy for Max to have known she wasn't there and why. The other half of that "why" being that she'd just been recovering from mind control herself.]
no subject
Date: 2025-01-03 04:56 pm (UTC)From:You can help, Rinku. You can make a difference. It isn't always through violence.
no subject
Date: 2025-01-03 05:49 pm (UTC)From:I know. Other people have said that too. Is that because no matter how strong I get or how hard I try, the other people around me will always be way better? I know that, and I know they probably think that too... but I still wanna keep trying. This is what I can do too.
But that doesn't mean the other stuff isn't good. And I can do it. Most of it, anyway. I didn't even suspect anything was wrong until it happened. That kinda happens a lot with me.
no subject
Date: 2025-01-09 04:56 am (UTC)From:Rinku, no matter who you talk to, who you look up to, whoever you look up to or look down on, there is always someone stronger. There are people and things and being stronger than me. There is, always, a bigger fish.
If you want power, to be a bigger fish, that takes more than hard work. That takes deals, invention, and you to do things. Some good. Some terrible.
Power never comes free, Rinku.
So, how powerful do you want to be?
no subject
Date: 2025-01-09 03:14 pm (UTC)From:Maybe that's not the right question. I mean, if I made more deals like that, it'd just make them worry, and if I did something bad, it wouldn't be helping at all. It's kind of like what caused this whole thing in the first place, right? When... [She screws up her face to think of the names she's been told.] Prince Louis listened to the Pierrot instead of his brother, and let him put all the stolen powers into him and ran away, and then all this stuff happened.
[Not to mention that he, you know, exploded not long after, so he didn't even really benefit. But.]
Some people talk a whole lot about evolution or being naturally better. And I guess a lot of people here seem like they're naturally better. But it's like you said before, one person shouldn't do it alone. And even if I'm "just" a human, and I used to be normal, and I only learned to fight here, it doesn't mean I can't keep trying.
[She looks at Max, guileless. Wondering, of everything he's said today, which he's really getting at -- but maybe thinking all that's a little complicated. She sets down her glass and starts to draw a spiral shape with her fingertip on the counter.]
Hm, let's see... When I'm happy, I can't stop spinning. Records and CDs spin when they play. And a lot of seashells, they spiral out like they're spinning, too. And when you spin, it's like, 「Happy Around!」 You know? It moves outward in a circle, like the shells. Happiness spreads out that way too!
So I think, even if I don't take it, I'll keep changing here the way I have been, and I'll always keep getting better than I am now. Even if I'm not a god, I'm just me. And maybe that's still good enough. Because it really isn't about the power in the first place. Getting stronger's about what I can do for everyone else, and how they're all doing their best too.
no subject
Date: 2025-01-12 12:59 am (UTC)From:Sounds like you've found a path to walk after all. Spinning around, spreading your happiness out in that Happy Around spiral.
People worrying about you isn't always a bad thing either. Depends on the amount of worry. Everyone worries about the people they care about, the people they love. That's natural and good. Now, if you start inspiring panic attacks, then there might actually be an issue.
no subject
Date: 2025-01-12 01:15 am (UTC)From:Thanks, Davis-san. For everything! You're always helping people, aren't you? Me, Neechan, your friends...
no subject
Date: 2025-01-16 04:42 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2025-01-16 06:24 pm (UTC)From:Yeah! Yeah, yeah! Then I'll work hard! I'm gonna keep trying, and maybe I'll be better than I am now. And maybe I won't worry so much like I was for the longest time.
no subject
Date: 2025-01-28 04:30 am (UTC)From: